I was talking to a group of polyamorous friends recently when a woman made an interesting comment. She likened lovemaking with men other than her husband to fine dining—different, exciting, and occasionally exceptional. By contrast, she said, sex with her husband was like returning to her favorite restaurant—comfortable, consistent, and deeply satisfying. “Like an old […]
The One Big Talk
Remember as a kid, one or both of your parents telling you to sit down before proceeding to deliver The One Big Talk? No? You never got The One Big Talk? Instead you were handed pamphlets by the Girl Scouts of America? No? You never got the pamphlets? You weren’t alone. A generation ago, doing […]
Do the $1,000 an Hour Tasks and Delegate the Rest
Insights and discoveries come in a rush—more so I think when we’re young and eager. After all, it’s been said that scientists and mathematicians produce their best work in their 20s and 30s. I was 28, fresh out of graduate school, driving home from a client who was paying me mind-boggling fees of $50 an […]
Free Yourself from the Curse of Co-Dependence
I remember the moment a decade ago when a big chunk of education fell in my lap. It was at a workshop on strengthening relationships, during which facilitator Reid Mihalko looked around the room at dozens of therapists, life coaches, and sexual healers, asking for a show of hands. “How many of you are in […]
It’s All about Craft
I’ve written two novels and designed two homes, one home being featured in Better Homes and Gardens. It has always seemed to me that the creative process for each is virtually the same. Both start with a blank slate, proceed with envisioning hundreds of possibilities for every space, room, and wall (plot, action, and character), […]
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